My energy level tonight probably won’t be that great.  For many reasons, but mostly because I was up till after 1:00am last night, and had to be up at 5:15am this morning to go back to work after 4 days off.  I am one that really can’t make it on 4 hours of sleep. *sighs*

Jane was officially back today, after being off for a few weeks.  Her contract now will last till the end of March. I think she has real mixed feelings on being back, but I understand that!  After 4 days I had mixed feelings too!  Of course we work for a boss who has her hands in so many different things….and we do our best to try to figure out what’s next as she throws things at you boom, boom, boom!!!! 

As she was giving me some sort of directive, my cell phone rang. I looked, it was the doctor’s office.  “I have to take this call, I don’t think this is good.” I told my boss.  When I answered it was the referral nurse letting me know that she had made an appointment for me with the Arthritis MD next week. I was a bit surprised by how soon she got me in, but okay.  “Did you get the X-rays back?” I asked her.  She had no clue what I was talking about so I told her never mind.  No news is good news.

I hung up and sort of said a “Whewww” wiping my brow in the process.  My boss’ mind was going too fast to even consider what might be happening in my world.  It’s okay.  I really don’t want to discuss this too much with people anyway.

We did some work, then she wanted to tell me about her latest twin soul stuff.  He still is in constant touch with her.  She told him over the phone this weekend how she had come to believe it was a journey and they were in one another’s lives to teach the other.  He confessed to her he learned many things from her too, and began to expand on what he meant by it.  So perhaps this is THE first time we have had a male who has run off and on for years “point of view.”  *note to the others reading here walking twin soul journeys*

She had to leave to meet her class at a spot where she was requiring her students to watch this “history-making” inaugural.  She took Jane with her to help with attendance as they were meeting in a ballroom today where the university had TVs set up for the occasion.  It was now 10:30am, and I would be free to try to catch up! I was to leave at 11:00am and was feeling very frustrated at how far behind I was running.  That’s when my cell phone rang.  I didn’t want it to ring, I really didn’t. I looked.  Yup, it was my doctor’s office………….again.

“Hello.”  “Hi, Sunshine?”  “Yes.”  “This is so and so from Dr. M’s office.  We got your X-rays back and he wants you to have an MRI.  We will have “Open MRI” contact you to set up the appointment.”  This really wasn’t a surprise to me as I knew how the X-ray technician yesterday had acted.  Now I had to wait for the MRI place to call me.

What a weird thing to experience, what I am.  It’s sure a journey of faith, and at the same time, a battle to not give into what seems to be something to be afraid of!

I came home from work and having lunch with Dell. I decided to ignore all of this! Donna had emailed me and we’re going to get together tomorrow night to celebrate Sydney’s new job and her leaving school.  I said I’d get the gift since I was off work this afternoon.  I then decided to go to the pool and work out.

As I leaving I noticed a message on my home phone. I listened. It was the MRI place.  “Please call us.”  I memorized the number and went out the door in sweats with my bathing suit underneath them. I called the number.  “We would like for you to come in this afternoon.”  WHAT?  Doesn’t it normally take like 2 weeks for this stuff to happen?  “Can you?”  “Well yeah, but I was going to go swim so I have my bathing suit on.”  “That’s perfect!”  First tho I had to go by my doctor’s office, get my x-rays, and the report and take it to them. There was question whether or not I would have to be contrasted, meaning dye shot in.

I did have my MRI.  They are not fun, that’s for sure.  Dell insisted on being there, which was probably good because they let him come back in the room.  The put you in a long tube, then leave the room in my case for approximately 30 minutes. I knew Dell was outside this tube sitting, so if I freaked out he was there.  There’s just something calming about that.  I did make it through, actually falling asleep during.

Now, I wait.  Isn’t it funny how your mind plays tricks on you?  I have had about every thought possible.

And with that I think I will head to bed.  It’s been a long sort of emotional day. But the awesome part is God keeps telling me I am okay.  I think I will choose to believe His voice and not what seems to be happening around me.

As the faith, love, and light lead me on.

Goodnight,

Sunshine