I’m just in from the hot tub after a day that I would call pretty uneventful, yet once again February 24 seems to be a day of “finding” for me, but more on that in a moment.  The stars were so bright tonight as I sat in the hot tub pondering what once again seems to be so against what could ever possibly happen, and yet, all the same, a knowing that this time, perhaps.

I was up again at 3:00am.  This time my 19-year old cat was the culprit!  I keep a gate on my bedroom door at night so Pete and Lilly don’t wander the house and stay in my room.  My cat also sleeps with me, but for some reason he appeared to go senile during the night.  He tried to jump the fence, missed, it fell over making a HUGE crash and then he cried and cried a HORRENDOUS “meow……………me ow…………”  Ugh! It was a dreadful noise!  Woke Dell up too.  It drove Dell more nuts than it did me, so I reminded Dell he was an old guy.  It was 3:45am, or something like that.  I could sleep this morning, Dell could not.  I had a hard time going back to sleep. I don’t like to wake up like that in the middle of the night.

But sleep finally came and the next thing I knew Dell was telling me goodbye, he was leaving for work. I wished him a happy birthday and told him I’d pick him up for lunch and take him anywhere he wanted to go.  I spoke the words through sleep.  It didn’t take much and I zonked back out. Until 7:30am.

I don’t know why, but I hoped up, did a few things around the house and then headed for the pool for water aerobics this morning.  This morning class isn’t near as tough as the late afternoon class. The morning one is mostly senior citizens, so they don’t push it too hard.  I tried to make it hard as I could tho, after all it would be my workout for the day.

On the way home, feeling this restlessness thing once again I cried out to God,  “Please help me. I need you to show me what is happening.”  Suddenly a thought came to me.  I needed to go home and check out what suddenly was being illuminated to me. It almost reminded me of 8 years ago when I was given the illumination and heard the voice whispering what was to come later that day. *Soul Mate*

I needed to take a shower to get ready to go get Dell in a little bit.  In the shower and once again doing my hair, it became quite clear what for sure I needed to do. I came out to the internet and got back on the Realtor Board, only this time, I searched a much higher price range.  One that is TOTALLY out of my price range, but it is what I heard God whisper!

Two pages into the search *BAM!*  There it was! The house I have seen in the visions for the past two years. If it isn’t it is pretty well darn close!  I began to read about it. My spirit was jumping, like you know from within, “THERE IT IS!”  Oh, but the price!  So my head started crunching numbers……………it seemed so impossible.

As I tried to just forget it, I felt as if the Lord reminded me that with Him, nothing is impossible!  If it is meant to be I will see Him open doors in the most incredible way.  And I remembered a word He spoke to me about 3 years ago,  “One day you will find yourself living in a log cabin, for I have one in mind for you.”  Is this it?  At the time I thought it was the one I had found and loved so much.  But those doors closed.  I probably forgot about Him telling me that so long ago as how many houses have I wanted along the way?  Every log cabin I have looked at NEVER felt right either, and I honestly had forgotten Him telling me that so long ago, until it was brought back to memory today.

This house is perfect!  It sits on nearly 10 acres, only this 10-acres wouldn’t take near the work this place does.  3 of the 10 acres is woods with a pond that sits on the edge of the woods.  There is a horse barn sided in cedar that matches the log cabin, and a huge pole barn where Dell could in fact have one heck of a wood shop for building furniture.  It’s only about 5 miles from a town of which I have come to really like, where Skylar and Bree take gymnastics.  It’d be about 15 minutes from Chad and Amy, and about the same amount of time from a different direction for Jason, Susie and Elizabeth.  It all felt so right and yet I kept going back to the price.

I met Dell for lunch.  “I found it.” I told him.  I couldn’t help but think how special it would be to really find this house on his birthday, and on the day I met Soul Mate, which was the BIGGEST, “I FOUND YOU!” moment I have and will ever have my whole life.  Doesn’t it seem appropriate this house that I’ve seen in my spirit for how long would *poof* come today?  We went to lunch where I gave him all the details. All it took was the large outbuildings, and horse barn with 5 stalls, and he was all interested too.  “But how will you afford it?” He asked me.  “With God all things are possible!” I told him, sounding pretty out there probably, but he’s learned to trust this faith I have on some things.

After lunch we went back to his store and pulled it up on the Realtor Board. All the guys that work with him huddled around too so impressed!  “Road trip on your birthday?” I asked Dell. “Sure, why not?”  He said. He knew what I was saying, we’d drive the 1.5 hour trip to drive by it tonight. Then I remembered a Realtor in the area who had been emailing me for how long?  Always sending me houses in the county of where this house sits. “I’ll call and see if I can get an appointment!” I told Dell.  “Okay.”

With that I left and went to get Dell’s birthday gift.  I got him a pair of jeans he so desperately needed and the “Eagles” newest CD.  Dell LOVES the Eagles!  Some nights I hear him in his room on youtube playing song after song, and any time you get in his car typically “The Eagles Greatest Hits” is playing. I thought it time he got their newest one.

Home I came, only now I had this horrible headache. I NEVER get headaches, or seldom do, but it was wiping me out.  I wasn’t so sure I wanted to do a road trip after all.

Once home I did call the Realtor and left a message.  “I think they want too much for today’s market, and I’d like to know what the taxes are on it, then I’d like to possibly go see it.  Please call me.”  And from there I started cleaning.  Tomorrow night I have a contractor coming to quote me on adding on to this house possibly. It seems things are in motion now! I’ll either stay here or I’ll move.  I’m gathering all the information I can on which direction I should go, so I wanted the house clean for the contractor tomorrow night.

The Realtor called back.  OMG!  The taxes!!! DIRT CHEAP!  “But why?” I asked him.  He gave me the appraisal price of the property according to the county assessor’s office and it was $130,000 LESS than the asking price.  He tried to explain that you can’t always go by that, but he agreed, some numbers were off here.  He agreed, they are asking too much so he will get me comps from houses similar in the area and what they have sold for.  Personally I feel sorry for these people selling this beautiful house because I am facing the same thing they may be.  Nothing is WORTH what it once was.  Oh the pain of it all!  I set up an appointment to go see the house on Thursday.  Dell and I will leave when he gets off work at 3:30.  It’ll give us enough time before it gets dark.

Will this be the one?  I always hate to talk about something like this before it happens just in case it isn’t, but I have to say it just feels right.  I just don’t understand how it would all even BEGIN to come together…………..but at the risk of not sounding complacent, I think if this is God, just like when Soul Mate came to my world after being told one day he would, this too will just all of a sudden fall together in the most “unbelievable” way, and I will know God DID take me there.

Of course I have thoughts tonight of getting a horse.  The other day we were driving up north of my town and went by a farm with a zebra on it.  This is the latest craze they tell me in this area so I want a zebra!  A few lima would be nice too………………but I won’t count my chickens before they’re hatched!  *laughs* I think that was a pun there!  And the thing is, if we do in fact go into one huge depression as so many are sensing, well, perhaps this will work as well as the property I live on now, only this time I am closer to the kids?  Oh, and of course the airport is only about 30 minutes away should the depression not happen and my book sell and one day I am going about doing book signings as so many have told me they see me doing!  And my horse, and my zebra, well…….Dell will be in 7^th heaven to taking care of it all. (or so he tells me)

Will it come to be?  I do believe it will, I just don’t know if this is “REALLY” it?  So the next few months could be interesting, or I could go see this place on Thursday and go OMG!  That wasn’t it at all!  Time will tell as I simply wait, walk the journey and let God lead as He wills.

As  the faith, love, and light lead me on.

Goodnight,

Sunshine

Goodnight Soul Mate:   All the day through I kept going back 8 years ago!  For instance right at this time (10:30pm) the show had just ended and we were back stage!  I came up to you and asked if you’d mind having a photo taken with me! You immediately put your arm around me, told me YOU’D LOVE IT and even tho the photographer wasn’t ready, you kept your arm around me.  It was the closest to you I had been, and I remember the feeling, “I’m home.  I’m finally home.”  *chuckles*  Dell was videotaping the whole thing and if you could see the look on our faces as I stood there with your arm around me, we both look as if we had arrived and our faces are so aglow.  It happened about right now, at this time 10:30pm, February 24, 2001.  I suppose most might think it weird I remember this with such detail all these years later, but how could I forget? It was the most real thing that had happened in my whole entire life. Everything I knew and looked for since my earliest memories was right next to me, until you had to fly out into the sunset once again.  How could something so beautiful be so painful at the same time as that weekend was for us?  I will always think it was for you too because I still see your face at the airport as you stared into my eyes, or was it my soul?  As I said, how could something so beautiful be so painful at the same time?  I guess we forgot that in the end it was about the journey and growing and learning all that we needed to………..and I guess still do. But 8 years later, here we are!  Still looking into one another’s soul…………..even if it is from the distance, it remains beautiful and painful at the same time.  I send you love and light…………………goodnight.  Love, Sunshine